Two Ways to Get What You Want: Ask and Attract…

I’m constantly endeavoring to simplify how to get what you want, both rapidly and accurately. In the process of doing so, I’ve discovered two simple ways to get what you want in life or business:  

1. You can ask for it.

2. You can attract it.

How do you ask? How do you attract? Well, there are four methods of asking for what you want, and four methods to attract it.

Asking for help

1. You can ask in-person.  

2. Asking via email is another option.  

3. You can ask via phone, through voice or text.  

4. Finally, you can ask through social media.  

Statistically, you stand a better chance for success if you have some sort of strategic ask in almost everything that you do — in-person, on the phone, over email, or on social media. Think about it: If you make one additional ask per day and convert at around 10 percent, then you have three people each month providing you with benefits that you’d have missed otherwise. 

It’s essential to make sure that your ask relates to some direct path to what you want, whether it is revenue, a business relationship or anything else of prime importance to you.

Ask and assist

This strategy uses the Ben Franklin Effect: When people do you a favor, they are more likely to do another. When you meet someone you yourself might be able to assist, ask for their help and, at the same time (e.g. in the same conversation) offer yours. And make a point to be of service even if others might not be able to help you immediately.

The same goes for phone calls, emails or social media interactions. Being afraid to ask for what you want is a detriment to your success and prosperity. If you lack this skill, then you need to work on it! Asking for help is a form of radical humility, something that with practice will have amazing benefits for all involved.

Having specific asks

There was a study published in the Journal of Applied Social Psychology about a female student posing as a panhandler. The unkempt, slovenly dressed girl went up to people on the street and asked for money. The purpose of the study was to show the importance of being specific with your ask. When she simply asked for “money,” the percentage of people who gave some to her was 22 percent. When she asked for a specific amount (e.g. “Can you spare 47 cents?”), the rate of generosity increased to 36 percent. The researchers called this the pique technique, where an unusual request helps to persuade someone to help.